Held by Grace, Not by Guilt

“I was doing okay,” Michael began. “I had a decent life. I wasn’t perfect, but I was making it.” For 12 years, he worked as a correctional officer and raised three kids after their mother passed away. “No food stamps, no government assistance. Just me working and making sure my kids were taken care of.”

Then life hit hard.

His youngest son had been violently attacked—pistol-whipped. In fear and anger, he called for help. But he didn’t call his father. He called his older brother. Michael's older son showed up and retaliated. That act of retaliation ended in a man’s death and led to a sentence of 47 and a half years in prison.

Michael was devastated, not just by the violence, but by the fact that his younger son hadn’t come to him. He even had to find out about the murder on the news. “I blamed myself,” Michael said. “And I also blamed my youngest son. I didn’t talk to him for nearly a year. I just kept thinking, if he had called me instead… things might have been different.”

As his emotional world collapsed, his physical health followed. “I had an angioplasty, then a hernia surgery, and another one after that. I was off work for months. I couldn’t pay the rent.”

Faced with mounting bills and no income, Michael made a desperate choice. “I started using drugs because I didn’t care anymore… I was just so far gone,” he admitted. “Then I started selling narcotics. I got arrested at a Circle K in Chandler at like three in the morning with 100 pills and two ounces of methamphetamines.”

For someone who had once enforced the law, the fall was staggering. “I did 12 years as a correctional officer… I wasn’t really a criminal,” he said. “Even my PO said, ‘You started your criminal career late.’” It was his first time in jail.

Afterward, Michael was given a choice: get into rehab or go back behind bars. “So I went to Purpose Healing for 28 days,” he said. “That helped me dry out a little bit, but I still needed somewhere to go.”

That’s when his therapist stepped in. “She recommended House of Refuge Sunnyslope and thank God for that. I wouldn’t have known about this place otherwise.”

“When I first got here, I was in survival mode,” Michael admitted. “But the mentors here… man, Edward and Tom—those guys are awesome. They didn’t judge me; they just walked with me.”

Through daily devotionals and Bible studies, Michael found what he’d been missing for years. But for him, it didn’t start that way. “I had a foster mom… she was evil,” he said. “She used church and the Bible to hurt me. She beat me and twisted Scripture to control me. I was just a kid, and that’s what I grew up with.”

Faith, to him, was fear and shame. “She didn’t show me who God really was. She made me hate it all. I hated going to church. I hated everything about it.” For years, Michael carried that pain. It built a wall between him and anything that looked like faith.

But at House of Refuge Sunnyslope, that wall began to break down.

“This place helped me in a way nothing else has,” he said. “Here, I started listening and learning from the Word, not because someone was using it against me, but because people were living it out with love and grace. That changed everything.”

He also appreciated the classes and people who invested in him. “Jan—she’s my favorite. I learned a lot from her. And Bryce too. He’s a good dude. Real helpful.”

Michael’s greatest accomplishment isn’t just his sobriety, it’s restoring his family. “Before I came here, I didn’t even know I had two grandkids. My daughter had a baby, and my son’s girlfriend had one four days later. I was so far gone in my addiction, I missed all of it. Now, I’ve reconciled with my kids. I get to be in their lives again.”

Michael is graduating from the program and moving into his own apartment. “I signed the lease, I have the keys,” he said. “I’m picking up the last of my stuff today.”

He’s not just moving into a new place, he’s moving forward with hope. “I want to start over right,” he shared. “Be stable. Be present. Just live right.”

His goals for the next six months are simple but deeply meaningful. “I want to pay off my car, and I want to be able to pick up both grandkids—maybe even have them spend the night,” he said. “That’s my number one goal: to be the grandfather to them that I wasn’t able to be for my own kids.”

He reflected on the past with honesty. “I used video games and TV as babysitters to raise my kids because I had to work,” he admitted. “But now I have a second chance.”

“I don’t want to hold a bag of dope anymore. I want to hold my grandbabies,” he added. “That’s what matters now.”

Michael’s story is living proof that transformation is possible. “This place saved my life and my relationship with my kids and grandkids,” he said.

What would Michael say to a new resident:

“Don’t give up—even if you’re in survival mode right now. I was there too. I came in broken, mad, and not sure I could change. But this place? It saved my life. Let the mentors help you. Talk to people like Edward and Tom. Go to Bible study. Open up. I’m 14 months sober now. I’m moving into my own place. I’ve got my kids and grandkids back in my life. If I can do it—you can too.”

What Michael would say to a donor:

“You didn’t just give money—you gave me my life back. Before I got here, I didn’t care about anything. I didn’t even know I had grandkids. I was holding bags of dope. Now I’m holding my grandbabies. I’ve got my own apartment, my family back, and hope again. What you gave made that possible. Thank you.”